If they only knew.

The funny thing about waiting to adopt is that once you’re officially in the ‘waiting’ stage, suddenly everyone you know is pregnant. I don’t begrudge anyone of happiness but it’s hard sometimes when I look at people that have no business having children (who don’t have the means to provide for them) but still have baby after baby…

Doing collections, I often talk to people who have 4, 5, 6 kids and another on the way and laugh about not even knowing how their going to feed “this one”. It breaks my heart to hear that. When I see a 15yo girl pushing a crying baby in a stroller and she’s too busy talking on her cellphone and smoking to tend to her… I get angry. So many people just have no clue how lucky they are to be able to say “Oops… I made a baby”. What an amazing thing that must be to be able to say.

I was on an adoption blog the other day and a woman was going off about Elton John and his partner having a baby. Now between you and I, I don’t necessarily think anyone having a baby in their 60’s, regardless of sexuality is a great idea, but that’s just my opinion. Anyway, this woman was going off about gay families and how a family with 2 dads deprives children of having both a mother & a father.

I hate that argument because it is such a slap in the face to not only all the gay and lesbian parents out there but also to all of the single parents as well. How many people are raised by single moms and grow up to be incredible people… And so many of the gay parents I know are truly incredible parents because they had to work and struggle so much just to become parents.

Children need love. Children need stability and security. They need bedtime stories, and trips to the zoo, they need sandcastles and family barbecues. They need a family… Regardless of the genders of the people that make up that family. I just cannot wait until we have that.

Three months later...

While reading a friends blog this morning, I realized that I haven’t blogged in months. It was early October to be exact… It’s funny because from mid-October until this past weekend is the time of year I actually had / have a lot going on.

On October 9th, Ron and I got married. It was an amazing day. We got to stand in our Church in front of our friends, our family and God and commit our lives to one another. It was a beautiful ceremony and was more than we could have hoped for. Afterwards we partied at the Country Club with a live Sinatra Impersonator during cocktail hour followed by dinner and dancing. It wasn’t the most opulent wedding ever, but it was *us*.

We spent a week at Disney. We stayed in the Park, which was lots of fun. I’d never stayed in the park before. We explored the Magic Kingdom, Animal Kingdom, Hollywood Studios, Epcot and Universal Studios. The Disney Parks are so gay friendly. When we got to our resort we were greeted with excitement and “Just Married” pins that we wore to all the parks all week. We had a wonderful time.

Halloween was great. We do Halloween right in our house. We love the old black and white scary movies. We hosted a murder mystery dinner with some good friends. We did the usual Halloween outings, like the Pumpkin Picking at Shadybrook Farm and the haunted hayride at Eerie Acres. The house was covered in purple & orange lights and jack-o-lanterns.

We hosted Thanksgiving for both of our immediate families. Ron cooked his first big holiday meal and he did an amazing job. Turkey, ham, mashed potatoes, sweet potatoes, glazed carrots, pineapple stuffing, sausage stuffing… and ofcourse my mother greenbean casserole… which is really more cheese than greenbeans. It was a nice day and a great way to kickoff the Christmas Season.

Christmas 2010 was wonderful… We decorated the house more than ever… Everyoine said you could see the house from space. We did all of our annual Christmas time trips, like Peddlers Village, our trip through the Shady Brook Farm lightshow, a trip downtown to see Macy’s lightshow and Dickens Village… and we saw the Gay Men’s Choir Christmas Concert. I could go on and on… Christmas Eve was spent with Ron’s family and his friend Dara and her daughter Da’nessa. Christmas day was spent with my family. We also got to spend some time with half of my family whom I hadn’t really spoken to in quite a while. It was really nice to spend time with everyone.

On New years Eve we usually go to the Melting Pot for dinner and then just watch the ball drop in our PJ’s but this year we went to a family party and had cocktails and dinner with great friends. It was a nice change of pace and a great way to kick off 2011.

On January 21st I turned 32. I used to dread my birthday because it goes hand in hand with the inevitability on ‘getting older’. Now though, I am just so happy with life that I can’t wait to see what the coming year holds for me. I hope and pray that this year we will have a child and add to the beautiful family that I am part of. This year I hope to spend more time with friends, entertaining and building memories. I want to take more daytrips and have more adventures. I want to reconnect with family that from whom relationships have been strained.

Mostly though, I hope this year echoes many of the same themes from the last couple years… Curling up under a blanket with his head on my shoulder watching old movies… giggling at the drive in theatre watching movies that as ‘adults’ we really shouldn’t be THAT amused by, talking endlessly at the diner with cup after cup of coffee / tea, finishing eachothers sentences while taking long walks around the neighborhood, and getting eachother when know one else does…

10~9~2010